Archive for October 2011

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Bal Harbour Baby, October 28, 2011

Took my beautiful baby, Stella, shopping today. On account of her no-good husband, Stella's been feeling blue, and so I decided an afternoon at Bal Harbour was just the thing for her. I had some business to attend to in Miami, but I got that handled pretty quickly, and then we headed over to the upscale shopping center. Stella says her favorite store is Balenciaga, but she did some damage to my American Express in Cesare Paciotti--how many pair of shoes does a young woman need? "Daddy, don't be mad at me," says Stella.

"As if I ever could ever be mad at you, Princess," I reply.

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Babes In Bikinis: October 20, 2011

Lunch at Sands Patio Bar in Pompano Beach. Being it's on the Intracoastal, Sand's is a busy place for boaters, and sort of a local hangout. Sometimes, I dock the Stella di Mare here while we take a little refreshment, but today Victor's got a new thirty-eight foot cruiser he's breaking in, and we're on his boat. It's me, Victor, and my cousin Anthony, in for a visit. Victor invited Nathan, but he's so serious he never wants to play.

The Sand's is also a hotel, and we're sitting at a patio table, poolside, and here comes six chicks in bikinis. Not one of them a day over thirty--Iowa farm girls on vacation. They're making a lot of noise and drinking daiquiris, and right away Victor sends over a round. Soon they're sitting at our table, and Anthony's putting the make on one, and now we're talking boat rides.

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La Famiglia, October 13, 2011

It's family hour at my house, and we're doing dinner on the terrace. The sun's fading from the sky, and the first hint of the moon begins to rise above the Atlantic. Angie's got some of her family in from Tampa, and Victor and my mother-in-law are putting together a feast, filet and shrimp and pasta. Michael's got a new girl--with the same kind of curves as the one he got rid of--but, hopefully, not the same habits. She's talking to Angie, trying to impress her, but she lets it slip that she has a three year old boy with a man she never married, and now my wife's not too keen her. I tell her to chill, they're just dating, and she says, "He takes after you. He makes mistakes with women."

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Showdown at the Greek Isles, October 6, 2011

What's the point of having a girlfriend if she acts like a wife?

Lunch at the Greek Isles Restaurant at the corner of Galt and A1A. It's an old favorite, low-key and casual, with the best Greek food in South Florida. Victor's got his chick with him, and they're getting serious--she's walking around with a yellow-diamond engagement ring--and I suppose that's what set off my girl, Kylie. Right from the start Kylie's acting funny--like she has a headache or PMS--and I'm doing my best to be Mr. Nice Guy. She pouts throughout the meal, and then Victor's chick goes to the john, and Kylie lets loose. "It's time you made a decision," she says.

What are we talking here, rice pudding or baklava? Kylie doesn't appreciate my humor, and she throws out the C word: commitment. Now, I'm getting a headache. I remind her of my marital status, and of how accepting she was of it. She wasn't talking commitment when I set her up in a Boynton Beach condo, was she? How about all those trips to Vegas and the Cayman's, not to mention the VISA perks? "You need to think about us," she says.  But I've just about had it, and I tell her, "Baby, there is no us."